What Have We Become

I live in Highland Park, Illinois, and no, I’m not going to talk specifically about what happened in our town on the Fourth of July, the shooting that killed seven innocents who had come out to watch a parade, a shooting that injured so many more, destroyed so many lives.  Because, well, isn’t that rather commonplace now?  So what’s to talk about, just another case of a guy with a gun, seeking destruction, his and others.  We read about it in the paper or hear about it on television or twitter or news feeds, and we move on because what does it really mean anymore?  When something is so common, it’s normal.  And now gun violence, mass killings are our normality.  So let’s move on.  We have other things to worry about so why worry about how our country has become brutalized, how lack of civility is the norm in every-day interactions?  Hey, you don’t get duck sauce with your Chinese take out?  The logical response is to kill the delivery guy, isn’t it?

I’m going to flaunt my age and remember how we used to be, when the only mass killing I ever heard about in my youth was the St. Valentine’s Day massacre.  Truly, that was it.  If there were guns around, they were probably brought back by returning soldiers from World War II or they were hunting rifles or rifles for skeet shooting.

Civility?  I still remember being in sixth grade.  We were a diverse group financially, if not racially.  Most of us were from middle class homes, although there was one member who had been in reform school. Who knows why?  But he was a delight to be with and very funny.  Then people from the city started moving in, and we had one boy in our class who was actually the child of a divorced mother. The shock of it all!  Our desks were arranged in a square so we could see one another, which led to a lot of silent messages being passed back and forth with raised eyebrows and smirks.  For some reason and I can’t remember why, right in the middle of class, this new kid said, “Damn it!”

How many mouths dropped open?  I know mine did.  Did we know swear words?  Yes.  Did we use them in school?  NEVER!  He was immediately sent to the principal’s office.  Remember, “principal” is your “pal,” while “principles” are something you should have, like not swearing in a classroom.

Okay, I won’t go into the next year, when we student council members were in a classroom all by ourselves; and instead of working on an agenda, we played spin the bottle.  Wow, Walter Gallegar, I still remember your soft, soft lips.  But we weren’t swearing.

Parades?  Oh, my, yes.  There were two close together, Memorial Day and the Fourth of July.  I marched proudly in both, first as a Brownie and then as a Girl Scout.  After the parade we were given a ticket for an ice cream cone from Mr. Johnson’s store.  Actually, there were two Mr. Johnsons, brothers who ran a store that had everything, ice cream and a pharmacy and magazines and candy.  I think they knew everyone in town by name.  Of course, that store is no longer in existence.  Nor, I assume, are the Johnson brothers.

Upstate was always having parades too.  That’s where I would go for my summer vacation to be with my grandparents.  The paraders would march proudly through the streets of the town; and then we’d all end in the park, where the bandstand was put to good use; and we’d listen to the band play old favorites until it was time to go home.

No one ever thought to bring a rifle to those parades, unless it was to exemplify the Spirit of ’76.  Remember?  That’s where we fought to be free of tyranny.

Now we have another tyranny of which gun violence is only a part.  A large part, yes.  But what we’re really suffering from is a tyranny of hate.  E Pluribus Unum be damned.  We hate each other.  What used to be a minor incident can blow up into a monstrous rage.  Someone got to the parking spot you wanted a second or two ahead of you.  You take your gun out of your glove compartment and shoot them dead.  Hey, their fault.  Librarians stock books you don’t like.  Satan works through them, right?  Politics, oh let’s not go there because we know the other side wants to and is destroying our country.

How to shut out the noise and should we?  How to redeem ourselves and our country?

Oh, I already hear the groans, the complaints.  Our country was never what you thought it was.  There was racism and isolationism and all sorts of discrimination, all those isms we were actually on the path to overcoming.  And then—  Well, we’re just not anymore, are we?

But can’t we just try for a kinder nation, united in an ability to see each other as fellow human beings instead of a target in the sight of a gun?

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Thoughts Upon Turning Eighty